Went out to the Griff' last night for some ale. They pay us in beer for the gigs we play so we can get caned free for a few sessions i also pick up some tab for designing pump clips. Whilst partaking of the free beverisation provided i began to get a sneaking feeling of guilt in the back of my mind then i realised what it was - taxation!
Obviously we need to pay taxes on the buckshee neck-oil but the way forward is not so clear. Sending roughly a third of a pint, per round, through the post is problematic. My solution is this - the local excise department needs to send an officer to sit in on the drinking sessions and he should drink every third sip. The man for the job should be of a thirsty nature as sessions involving whole bands could take a bit of a toll on his constitution and he should also be required to provide thirty-three and a third of the conversation. The person concerned would also need to make sure that he was up to date on his tetanus shots etc specially when sharing a glass with the Detectives/Stiffs.
How can this benefit the nation as a whole i hear you say. The proceedings could be recorded on a video camera and podcasts supplied via the Internet for people to download and enjoy. Early morning showings on the televisions in electrical shop windows would enable tramps and dirty stop-outs to feel included in the initiative. I shall be e-mailing the new chancellor with my proposals so read the financial sections for more news.
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